I have two toddlers, Izzy is 4 and half, Penny is two and half and they are quite a handful. They are constantly on go. They work up thinking of fun and are at it the whole day. The times that they remember they need me is when they are either hungry, they have done something to each other or I have to be part of the play. The other day, I had to be “piggy in the middle”. Sadly, they can’t throw balls at each other, they have no sense of direction and Penny is constantly distracted.
I am sure mothers who work from designated offices think it’s easier for work from home mums. It’s not, you see your kids but you can go for weeks without actually connecting with them. You wake up early so that you can get a few things done before they wake up, they wake up, you have to supervise brushing teeth, morning cereal and you sit down. Another hour to finish up something work related and now, the kids are constantly calling you or demanding something. Make breakfast, bath the girls, get back to work……you are on repeat the whole day between work, attending to some need and getting food into their stomachs. You can get to Friday, look at your kids and realise, that you didn’t SEE your kids at all this week, you didn’t talk to your kids and you didn’t play with them. You were not PRESENT at all, everything was just reactive.
Below are my five ways that I try to connect with my kids;
1. Wake up some two hours earlier and get on with the most important tasks of the day, that way I can spare up some portion of the day for your kids
2. Sit down together with my kids at the dinner table
3. Set aside one day of the week or even a portion of that day, that you do something fun with the kids
4. Do something that you love with them, at least once a week, I try to bake, I like to involve them in the baking.
5. Encourage your kids to look you in the eye, they say that eyes are windows to the soul, when you talk to someone and look them in the eye, the conversations are deeper and the other person feels the connection. It also works with kids try to maintain eye contact especially when giving them life lessons, or when enquiring what’s wrong.
With all this below, you will realise that you will miss something but you won’t miss as much as in the reactive parenting style. Let’s do better with our kids.
What are you doing as a mompreneur to stay in the present with your kids?